Are they really "just words"?

James 3
The heading of the chapter in my Bible says, "A true faith will control the tongue."  This heading is the third put in place as a study help in my old Scofield reference Bible. 
James 1:  The testings of faith (vs. 1-12), The solicitation to do evil is not of God (vs. 13-21), The test of obedience (vs. 22-25), The test of true religion (vs. 26-27).
James 2:  The test of brotherly love (vs. 1-13), The test of good works (vs. 14-20), The illustration of Abraham (vs. 21-26).
James 3 all devoted to the matter of our tongue. 
I am still trying to digest the book study on the tongue.  I finished reading the book about the weight of words and I'm reeling.  My first reaction is to want to never open my mouth again, but the author pointed out that "One option is to stop talking, but that is only a temporary solution because we can't keep quiet forever!  Though silence is golden, it is not the key to a transformed tongue.  In nearly every Scripture passage where the tongue is mentioned or illustrated, there is also an insight into the heart problem that prompted the sinful talk...we must look at the heart problems of pride, anger, and fear that create sins of the tongue." 
"Proud heart produces:  boasting, flattery, reviling, cursing, lying, mockery, contention, slander, gossip, quarreling, perverse speech, careless opinions, and angry words.
Psalm 10, Prov. 8:13, Psalm 12, Psalm 59, Romans 1:29-30, Psalm 73:6-11, Prov. 13:10, Prov. 10:14

Anger is one of our most powerful emotions.  It has the capacity for destruction on personal, as well as social, levels.  Hatred and bitterness are the poisonous fruit of long-term, unresolved anger.  An angry heart creates dissension, lying lips, strife, and threats fueled by the bitterness, hatred, and rebellion that lives there.  Many people are harmed by words that flow out of a bitter heart:  contentious words, lying, strife, slander, murmuring, cruel words, rebellious words, defiling words.

Hebrews 12:15, Deut. 1, Numbers 14, Prov. 27:4, Prov. 10:12 and 18, Prov. 15:18, 24:28-29, 29:22, 30:33
Fear appears in  many different ways...and often arises in regard to potential loss, and such fear frequently motivates or manipulates us.  Our feelings and words are strong when faced with the possible loss of safety, position, reputation, security, family, friends, wealth, power, or happiness.
A fearful heart holds onto insecurity, guilt, jealousy, envy, and impatience. The words spin out and travel down a self-oriented track leading to destruction:  lying, slander, murmuring, rebellious words, beguilement, abusive words, false witness, deceit, cursing, flattery, exaggeration.
Numbers 14:9-10, John 8:44-45, Matthew 26:59-61, 73-74"
taken from the book, The Weight of Your Words

This book study has turned into "The Book" study as I have looked up these references.  Every time I open my mouth...I am thinking about what type of words are coming out.  Those words aren't "just words"!  My words have the power to bless or burn!
Because I am God's child and I will stand before Him one day, I need to submit to His Word.  By God's grace, I can have the right kind of heart that will produce words that are full of grace and truth...which build, not destroy!