friends. It has taken me ahile to go back through my notes from our ladies' retreat (on friendship). I have also gone through our Bible study outline for our ladies' group at church, and now I am spending time reading through Proverbs.
I am preparing for the Bible study for our November meeting...on friendship. It is one of our Pearls from Proverbs. I think it is interesting that I would get this topic...
I honestly have never had one best girlfriend that has been there throughout every stage of life. Some people are blessed with that kind of a friend. I never was. I don't know why exactly. I was never the "outgoing" one in our family. My sister made friends easily and quickly and I "got in on the deal" because we were sisters...eleven months apart...I had a "built in" friend...till I went to college. Then I had to make friends on my own...that wasn't easy for me!
I have lost touch with highschool and college friends. Maybe it was because we moved, maybe it was because they moved.
I have had several different friends who were there during specific times in my life and I am grateful for them. But as the years pass, circumstances change and interests lead you on different paths...you lose touch and soon you find yourself surrounded by a different set of people that you refer to as your friends.
I have found it hard to keep in touch with old friends due to the demand on my time as a wife and mother. Ok...it has been impossible for me! So blogging and a visit here and there on facebook help to reconnect. I have fond memories and my ears always perk up to hear about friends from the past. We had the chance to catch up with MBBC college friends last night and enjoyed the fellowship! When we can work it out to meet up with people, we do.
I have found that it takes work to make and keep friends in the here and now with the demands of parenting and business-owning. Even with the help of the internet and cell phones, friendship takes time and effort! It means sitting down and visiting with someone who needs to talk...forgetting the list of things you were trying to accomplish. It means answering a phone...amidst the chaos of the daily schedule. It means stopping to jot a note...while you are running back and forth. It means answering the questions of your children..."why are we doing that?" and teaching them to be friends to those that they meet.
Our speaker at the ladies' retreat asked a very direct question, "How long has it been since you sat down with a friend and a cup of coffee...and didn't look at your watch? Ladies, we are too busy!"
But...but...I wouldn't get my dishes done if I did that...or I'd miss my program if I took the time to do that...never thinking about what that friend needed at that moment that I could offer...by just stopping...and listening and sharing.
"We should not be looking for a friend to meet our needs, but looking to see how we can meet their needs. Our example is Jesus Christ!" reminded our speaker over and over at our retreat.
So many people just need a friend...someone to care that they just lost their best friend to cancer, a friend who moved away, a friend who is going through a trial, a friend who could use an extra hand, a friend who is new to the area, a friend who lost her friends when she got saved...the list goes on and on...
I have a friend who every day is realizing the days we have on this earth are short. We only have so many days...and so often we waste them. We only have so many breaths...yet we don't use them wisely. We only have so many words...and use them up with unkind ones. We only have so many opportunities...yet we squander them on ourselves.
We take for granted the time we have with friends...(and family, which you hopefully can call your friends). I know I took those special times for granted, and to my shame...still do. I realized it when my sister moved away...and then again when my Mom moved away. But we get busy with the day to day routine and forget...we forget what is important.
That thought process hits home every day as I see my husband struggle with his health. I don't know how long I will have with my best friend...the one for whom I had to wait a long time, the one who gives unselfishly, the one who challenges me, the one who loves me, the one who has been there in good and bad times, the one who supports me in many areas, the one who makes me laugh, the one who comforts and protects me...
It hit me this afternoon...here...I have been looking around and thinking about friendships...and I have the best example of a best friend (in addition to My Lord)...right in front of me!
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