friends. It has taken me ahile to go back through my notes from our ladies' retreat (on friendship). I have also gone through our Bible study outline for our ladies' group at church, and now I am spending time reading through Proverbs.
I am preparing for the Bible study for our November meeting...on friendship. It is one of our Pearls from Proverbs. I think it is interesting that I would get this topic...
I honestly have never had one best girlfriend that has been there throughout every stage of life. Some people are blessed with that kind of a friend. I never was. I don't know why exactly. I was never the "outgoing" one in our family. My sister made friends easily and quickly and I "got in on the deal" because we were sisters...eleven months apart...I had a "built in" friend...till I went to college. Then I had to make friends on my own...that wasn't easy for me!
I have lost touch with highschool and college friends. Maybe it was because we moved, maybe it was because they moved.
I have had several different friends who were there during specific times in my life and I am grateful for them. But as the years pass, circumstances change and interests lead you on different paths...you lose touch and soon you find yourself surrounded by a different set of people that you refer to as your friends.
I have found it hard to keep in touch with old friends due to the demand on my time as a wife and mother. Ok...it has been impossible for me! So blogging and a visit here and there on facebook help to reconnect. I have fond memories and my ears always perk up to hear about friends from the past. We had the chance to catch up with MBBC college friends last night and enjoyed the fellowship! When we can work it out to meet up with people, we do.
I have found that it takes work to make and keep friends in the here and now with the demands of parenting and business-owning. Even with the help of the internet and cell phones, friendship takes time and effort! It means sitting down and visiting with someone who needs to talk...forgetting the list of things you were trying to accomplish. It means answering a phone...amidst the chaos of the daily schedule. It means stopping to jot a note...while you are running back and forth. It means answering the questions of your children..."why are we doing that?" and teaching them to be friends to those that they meet.
Our speaker at the ladies' retreat asked a very direct question, "How long has it been since you sat down with a friend and a cup of coffee...and didn't look at your watch? Ladies, we are too busy!"
But...but...I wouldn't get my dishes done if I did that...or I'd miss my program if I took the time to do that...never thinking about what that friend needed at that moment that I could offer...by just stopping...and listening and sharing.
"We should not be looking for a friend to meet our needs, but looking to see how we can meet their needs. Our example is Jesus Christ!" reminded our speaker over and over at our retreat.
So many people just need a friend...someone to care that they just lost their best friend to cancer, a friend who moved away, a friend who is going through a trial, a friend who could use an extra hand, a friend who is new to the area, a friend who lost her friends when she got saved...the list goes on and on...
I have a friend who every day is realizing the days we have on this earth are short. We only have so many days...and so often we waste them. We only have so many breaths...yet we don't use them wisely. We only have so many words...and use them up with unkind ones. We only have so many opportunities...yet we squander them on ourselves.
We take for granted the time we have with friends...(and family, which you hopefully can call your friends). I know I took those special times for granted, and to my shame...still do. I realized it when my sister moved away...and then again when my Mom moved away. But we get busy with the day to day routine and forget...we forget what is important.
That thought process hits home every day as I see my husband struggle with his health. I don't know how long I will have with my best friend...the one for whom I had to wait a long time, the one who gives unselfishly, the one who challenges me, the one who loves me, the one who has been there in good and bad times, the one who supports me in many areas, the one who makes me laugh, the one who comforts and protects me...
It hit me this afternoon...here...I have been looking around and thinking about friendships...and I have the best example of a best friend (in addition to My Lord)...right in front of me!
Showing posts with label 2009. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 2009. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Thursday, August 19, 2010
"Every woman is a homemaker..."
"...whether you work outside or inside the home. If we live in a home, we are a homemaker. Anything you can do to create that 'ahhh...it's good to be home' feeling is the best gift you can give to your family...we have the help of the Lord! If you haven't read it in a while, I want to encourage you to read Proverbs 31..."
I was visiting a blog the other day and I read this post from Sugar Pie Farmhouse and it was encouraging to me! My most important job as a wife and mother is to be a keeper at home! The Bible tells me so!
I have had the privilege of being able to be at home with our children, yet I have to continually be on guard to protect that time and responsibility...first! I cannot do the job well when I am off and running here, there, and everywhere! I also cannot do that job well when I continually take on this project here and this project there. I do not do it well...and my family suffers...I have learned this the hard way! I take my frustration out on them when they don't cooperate so I can do what I wanted to do! Yikes! What is my first responsibility? Why?
I was challenged to think again...Do I create that "ahhh...it's good to be home feeling" for my husband, children, and all who come in my home? Or would they rather be somewhere else?
A sobering thought! I am responsible for the welcoming atmosphere in our home...which means I would also be responsible for the unwelcoming atmosphere as well! Whether we admit it or not...the woman's contentment in her role as a keeper at home determines much in the blessing her family enjoys! I want to provide a place of peace and comfort, happiness and safety, a place where God's Word is practiced, and a place where the basic needs of life are met! The kind of car I drive to the grocery store doesn't help me do that job better...I have a car that runs reliably! I don't have to have my hair done at the "in vogue salon" because no one would see the expense while it is in a clip. I can do my own nails just as nice and cheaper than the salon. I don't need to hang out at the mall and go shopping once/twice a week for things that make us selfish and add more clutter. We don't have to indulge in every toy imaginable because it just makes us...selfish...and adds more clutter! I am really having issues with clutter and junk...it collects under beds and makes our rooms a mess...well, and catches and collects dust! (We took two bags out yesterday to Salvation Army.)
The Bible tells me that if we have food and raiment...a place to lay our head...we have all we need! And what we have is very nice and we are teaching our children to take care of what we have. It is called stewardship.
Proverbs 31 isn't a list of unattainable qualities...which is how I often view it because there are areas of weakness in my life! Rather, I should look at Proverbs 31 as a basic pattern and checklist for my daily "to do" list...How am I doing on this or that? Have I ever tried this or that...would it make my home run more smoothly? Would this or that be a blessing to my husband?
I am thankful for the tools I have to make all these jobs easier...I just have to remember to use the one that helps me most...more often..the Bible!
***I don't receive compliments very well. Never have...they make me uncomfortable. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the kind words and thoughts of others. But I am always very aware that any good that I do is only because God has given me the ability. I also weigh my heart attitude in each situation. Was it a joy to do such and such or was is just another chore? If my reason or motivation for doing or being is wrong...then I know full well that I do not deserve any type of compliment!
I received a beautiful hand-written letter full of compliments and praise from someone who knows me well. I am thankful for the kindness and love. It brought tears to my eyes. But it also made me very aware that God has more work to do on my heart and mind! Thank the Lord that His Word is true and faithful...and that love can be blind as well as patient!***
I was visiting a blog the other day and I read this post from Sugar Pie Farmhouse and it was encouraging to me! My most important job as a wife and mother is to be a keeper at home! The Bible tells me so!
I have had the privilege of being able to be at home with our children, yet I have to continually be on guard to protect that time and responsibility...first! I cannot do the job well when I am off and running here, there, and everywhere! I also cannot do that job well when I continually take on this project here and this project there. I do not do it well...and my family suffers...I have learned this the hard way! I take my frustration out on them when they don't cooperate so I can do what I wanted to do! Yikes! What is my first responsibility? Why?
I was challenged to think again...Do I create that "ahhh...it's good to be home feeling" for my husband, children, and all who come in my home? Or would they rather be somewhere else?
A sobering thought! I am responsible for the welcoming atmosphere in our home...which means I would also be responsible for the unwelcoming atmosphere as well! Whether we admit it or not...the woman's contentment in her role as a keeper at home determines much in the blessing her family enjoys! I want to provide a place of peace and comfort, happiness and safety, a place where God's Word is practiced, and a place where the basic needs of life are met! The kind of car I drive to the grocery store doesn't help me do that job better...I have a car that runs reliably! I don't have to have my hair done at the "in vogue salon" because no one would see the expense while it is in a clip. I can do my own nails just as nice and cheaper than the salon. I don't need to hang out at the mall and go shopping once/twice a week for things that make us selfish and add more clutter. We don't have to indulge in every toy imaginable because it just makes us...selfish...and adds more clutter! I am really having issues with clutter and junk...it collects under beds and makes our rooms a mess...well, and catches and collects dust! (We took two bags out yesterday to Salvation Army.)
The Bible tells me that if we have food and raiment...a place to lay our head...we have all we need! And what we have is very nice and we are teaching our children to take care of what we have. It is called stewardship.
Proverbs 31 isn't a list of unattainable qualities...which is how I often view it because there are areas of weakness in my life! Rather, I should look at Proverbs 31 as a basic pattern and checklist for my daily "to do" list...How am I doing on this or that? Have I ever tried this or that...would it make my home run more smoothly? Would this or that be a blessing to my husband?
I am thankful for the tools I have to make all these jobs easier...I just have to remember to use the one that helps me most...more often..the Bible!
***I don't receive compliments very well. Never have...they make me uncomfortable. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the kind words and thoughts of others. But I am always very aware that any good that I do is only because God has given me the ability. I also weigh my heart attitude in each situation. Was it a joy to do such and such or was is just another chore? If my reason or motivation for doing or being is wrong...then I know full well that I do not deserve any type of compliment!
I received a beautiful hand-written letter full of compliments and praise from someone who knows me well. I am thankful for the kindness and love. It brought tears to my eyes. But it also made me very aware that God has more work to do on my heart and mind! Thank the Lord that His Word is true and faithful...and that love can be blind as well as patient!***
Monday, August 9, 2010
Psalm 34
"I will bless the Lord at all times: His praise shall continually be in my mouth..."
This is the passage that our devotions came out of this morning...what a way to start the week! When I focus on the Lord..."seek Him, and He hears me...He delivers me from all my fears!" It doesn't say He removes those things that cause me to be fearful...He tells me where my focus is to be and that He is near and hears me. What a wonderful reminder for a new week! I have the opportunity...and responsibility to bless the Lord...and be glad! I also have a few things that I have to make sure I obey, as I am reminded as I read the following verses:
Trust in Him
Fear the Lord
Hearken unto Me
Keep thy tongue from evil and thy lips from speaking guile
Depart from evil
Do good
Seek peace and pursue it
Have a broken heart and contrite spirit
...living righteously takes a surrendered and obedient heart...and it isn't always easy! It is a daily surrender.
But because He is the Lord...and He has redeemed my soul...I have a reason to "...be glad...maginfy Him...and exalt His name..."
This is the passage that our devotions came out of this morning...what a way to start the week! When I focus on the Lord..."seek Him, and He hears me...He delivers me from all my fears!" It doesn't say He removes those things that cause me to be fearful...He tells me where my focus is to be and that He is near and hears me. What a wonderful reminder for a new week! I have the opportunity...and responsibility to bless the Lord...and be glad! I also have a few things that I have to make sure I obey, as I am reminded as I read the following verses:
Trust in Him
Fear the Lord
Hearken unto Me
Keep thy tongue from evil and thy lips from speaking guile
Depart from evil
Do good
Seek peace and pursue it
Have a broken heart and contrite spirit
...living righteously takes a surrendered and obedient heart...and it isn't always easy! It is a daily surrender.
But because He is the Lord...and He has redeemed my soul...I have a reason to "...be glad...maginfy Him...and exalt His name..."
Saturday, August 7, 2010
Ahhh...
Saturday...always brings time for reflection and for relaxation from the normal schedule of the week...well, I mean for the kids and I. There are peaceful sounds of play amid the background of the washing machine touched with the aroma of coffee. We will have to make a trip out...later...and I am thinking I need to pick up a can of spray whipped cream! Thanks to a friend...hot chocolate will never be the same without it!
This picture reminds of the sweetness that comes when you take time to spend it with a friend...doing nothing...but sharing some time! So often, we casually say...If you need anything, call...but do you notice...people never call?! So why do we keep saying it? Does it make us feel good?
I think we are going to be surprised when we stand before the Lord and He asks us the "Why did you do this?" or "Why did you not do this? You said...you cared...you were to be My Hands and Feet while you were on earth! I gave you an example to follow...why didn't you follow?" Well...we splutter...we did our part in letting them know we would help. I can't be responsible that they didn't let me know. After all...I have things to do! So we then we throw out the phrase we're praying for you...did you...really?
We say things...so often...so flippantly...knowing that we will never do anything about it...'cause they didn't ask or they didn't let me know. Hello...they aren't going to! What about putting yourself in front of their cup of cocoa...what are they going through? What would be my concerns? What would help me most? What would I want my friends to know? Am I adding to the weight on their shoulders...in my actions, lack of character, insensitive words, and lame excuses? I know we can't make people accept our invitations and acts of kindness...but we can put ourselves behind their cup of cocoa and offer to make it even sweeter...with a simple can of spray whipped cream!
When we are in a valley...that is the best time to reach out to others...in unselfish love and pure motives...a servant...just like our Lord Jesus Christ! We don't always know exactly what to say or do...but God shows us each step of the way...
So the next time you flippantly say something in the context of caring...
think first...
because God sees and hears all...He can't make you keep your words (well, He can...you understand my point..?), but He will hold you accountable!
This picture reminds of the sweetness that comes when you take time to spend it with a friend...doing nothing...but sharing some time! So often, we casually say...If you need anything, call...but do you notice...people never call?! So why do we keep saying it? Does it make us feel good?
I think we are going to be surprised when we stand before the Lord and He asks us the "Why did you do this?" or "Why did you not do this? You said...you cared...you were to be My Hands and Feet while you were on earth! I gave you an example to follow...why didn't you follow?" Well...we splutter...we did our part in letting them know we would help. I can't be responsible that they didn't let me know. After all...I have things to do! So we then we throw out the phrase we're praying for you...did you...really?
We say things...so often...so flippantly...knowing that we will never do anything about it...'cause they didn't ask or they didn't let me know. Hello...they aren't going to! What about putting yourself in front of their cup of cocoa...what are they going through? What would be my concerns? What would help me most? What would I want my friends to know? Am I adding to the weight on their shoulders...in my actions, lack of character, insensitive words, and lame excuses? I know we can't make people accept our invitations and acts of kindness...but we can put ourselves behind their cup of cocoa and offer to make it even sweeter...with a simple can of spray whipped cream!
When we are in a valley...that is the best time to reach out to others...in unselfish love and pure motives...a servant...just like our Lord Jesus Christ! We don't always know exactly what to say or do...but God shows us each step of the way...
So the next time you flippantly say something in the context of caring...
think first...
because God sees and hears all...He can't make you keep your words (well, He can...you understand my point..?), but He will hold you accountable!
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Hey, your slip is showing!
How many of you looked down to check just now? Haha. It is a natural reaction for us women folk!
We worry about a trail of toilet paper on our shoe or a pepper flake on our tooth or crusties on our faces.
We look hurriedly around when we trip and almost land on our face, "Did anyone see me?"
We groan inwardly and shush outwardly when our children actually say what they are thinking...out loud...in public...about anything and everything!
Would we be phased at all...if we heard a person remark, "And she says she is a Christian?" after watching our antics that were out in the open...for all the world to see?!
Oh, give them a break, they were having a bad day! They are just strongly opinionated. They are just so shy. You fill in the excuse...I've used many myself already...they don't hold water!
Now, Kari, you are taking that a little too far, don't you think?
"But...the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, goodness, gentleness, faith, meekness, temperance; against such there is no law." Galatians 5:22-23. Nope...pretty sure, I'm not...it is in there!
You are being judgmental.
Ok...so, now another question...what would you say in response to that unsaved person who asked this question?
Too judgmental, now? He was calling it like he saw it!
An apple is an apple 'cause it looks like one, tastes like one, grows like one, smells like one!
"By their fruit...you shall know them!"
Hmmm...Am I being too harsh when I say, people don't care/hear only about what you say...they care/watch what you do...day in and day out...and for most...they don't care what you did on Sunday because they saw you in action on the other days of the week.
Can you tell me...why in the world they would want, what we say we have, when they see that kind of behavior on a regular basis from people "who say they are Christians"?
Oh, friends...we've got the "Sunday Show" down pat! Our slips aren't showing and our teeth are clean...but that is just the outside! The "real us" comes out on Monday, Tuesday, oh...maybe not Wednesday so much 'cause that is a church night too...gotta be happy for those kids, Thursday, Friday, and well...on Saturday, yeah, 'cause it is the end of the week...we're tired...and nobody can be perfect all the time!
Next time someone tells you something is wrong with your appearance...stop and consider...what other "in the flesh" flaws are you outwardly demonstrating as a child of God. Because people are watching...and they may have heard about the love of God and they may be starting to understand His holiness and judgment of sin...
And friend, by your "un-Christ-like" actions and attitudes...you may have just destroyed their desire to be one of His children...and they will put it off...and they may never get that chance again!
It matters what you let slip...anywhere...anyhow...
anytime!
We worry about a trail of toilet paper on our shoe or a pepper flake on our tooth or crusties on our faces.
We look hurriedly around when we trip and almost land on our face, "Did anyone see me?"
We groan inwardly and shush outwardly when our children actually say what they are thinking...out loud...in public...about anything and everything!
Would we be phased at all...if we heard a person remark, "And she says she is a Christian?" after watching our antics that were out in the open...for all the world to see?!
Oh, give them a break, they were having a bad day! They are just strongly opinionated. They are just so shy. You fill in the excuse...I've used many myself already...they don't hold water!
Now, Kari, you are taking that a little too far, don't you think?
"But...the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, goodness, gentleness, faith, meekness, temperance; against such there is no law." Galatians 5:22-23. Nope...pretty sure, I'm not...it is in there!
You are being judgmental.
Ok...so, now another question...what would you say in response to that unsaved person who asked this question?
Too judgmental, now? He was calling it like he saw it!
An apple is an apple 'cause it looks like one, tastes like one, grows like one, smells like one!
"By their fruit...you shall know them!"
Hmmm...Am I being too harsh when I say, people don't care/hear only about what you say...they care/watch what you do...day in and day out...and for most...they don't care what you did on Sunday because they saw you in action on the other days of the week.
Can you tell me...why in the world they would want, what we say we have, when they see that kind of behavior on a regular basis from people "who say they are Christians"?
Oh, friends...we've got the "Sunday Show" down pat! Our slips aren't showing and our teeth are clean...but that is just the outside! The "real us" comes out on Monday, Tuesday, oh...maybe not Wednesday so much 'cause that is a church night too...gotta be happy for those kids, Thursday, Friday, and well...on Saturday, yeah, 'cause it is the end of the week...we're tired...and nobody can be perfect all the time!
Next time someone tells you something is wrong with your appearance...stop and consider...what other "in the flesh" flaws are you outwardly demonstrating as a child of God. Because people are watching...and they may have heard about the love of God and they may be starting to understand His holiness and judgment of sin...
And friend, by your "un-Christ-like" actions and attitudes...you may have just destroyed their desire to be one of His children...and they will put it off...and they may never get that chance again!
It matters what you let slip...anywhere...anyhow...
anytime!
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