but they seem all jumbled up most of the time these days. When I sit down to sort them out...I end up in tears. Not sure why the tears...nobody sees them as I have about seven hours alone each day. I have tried to keep myself busy with settling and daily chores...but then I get to a point that I just need to stop. I want to sleep, but feel guilty about wasting time doing that while the rest of my family is being stretched beyond comfort levels. I pray for each of them as I wash dishes or fold their laundry or make treats. I really have a cushy job compared to everyone else...so what is my problem?
We just went through a big change! Now...things are "slowing down" into a new normal and there is time to absorb what truly just took place in our family in under a month! WOW!
I forget about how change will affect you...physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. For several weeks, Ted and I were preparing for the possibilities. We knew the work that would be involved. We knew that God had been working all things for our good for a long time. We were ready for change...but then it actually happened! It felt like we had been holding our breath for a long time! We found out there are things that come up that we didn't know about or didn't consider to be part of the changing process. God has worked on our behalf in amazing ways! He has given us grace to help our children deal with the changes, and to be strong when discipline issues arise because of it. They are responding well from what we observe.
We know there are more things that will arise each and every day!!!
We sang "How Great Thou Art" and "Great Is Thy Faithfulness" on Sunday night. I stood there with tears streaming down my face as I listened to the auditorium echo with voices of fellow members singing for all they were worth. It is amazing!!! The children sing just as loud as the adults. In choir, we practiced the song "I Stand Redeemed". I had goosebumps and pray that I can get through the song on Sunday without breaking down like I have almost every service since we have first visited. My heart has been refreshed and encouraged just by the life and energy of the music program in this church. The preaching has been convicting and edifying. This Sunday begins special meetings till Wednesday. This is a busy place...and it is fun to watch the kiddos soaking it all up!
I am thankful for where we have been. I am thankful for the lessons learned in the valley. I am thankful for the growth we have seen in our lives and in our family.
I am thankful for where we are now. I know there is still so much more to learn. I am looking forward to what God has in store for our family.
I guess...I will continue to have these thoughts and tears for awhile...for they come from a thankful heart!
No comments:
Post a Comment